GrooveLily

It was a beautiful Saturday afternoon in the suburbs.  Early April.  The time when every self-respecting suburban dad’s mind turns to … well … softball.

My good friend Brian, a great guy and a well-established Montclair, NJ dad and citizen, heard me say that I would love to get involved in a regular softball game after so many years of my poor mitt sitting in a box wrapped around my now 25-year-old clincher. Turns out, he plays regularly in an over-30 league and managed to get me an invitation to join the team.  This past Saturday was the first practice, and I dusted off the old mitt and went over to the park with Suzanne, Elias, and Jacob in tow.

As luck would have it, there was another team from the same league practicing on the same field, so we got together an impromptu scrimmage.  I won’t go into the details of the game, other than to say my errors far out-numbered my contributions.  I imagine my expectations were way too high for a 47-year-old guy who hadn’t played in quite a few years, and I should have been happy with a base hit over the short stop’s head and a couple of good catches in the field, not to mention my 3-year-old saying “Good job daddy!” each time I came in off the field (he also would ask each time if the game was over yet, but that somehow lacks the poetic oomph I’m going for here), but I was sorta miserable. I couldn’t help feeling that I was letting everyone down, and I was embarrassed and mad at myself.

Rehearsing with "Steve Wexler and the Top Shelf" at 12 Grapes in Peekskill, NY

Luckily, that evening, I had a gig with “Steve Wexler and the Top Shelf,” a 9-piece band (4 rhythm section, 4 horns, and a great singer named Edlene Hart) led by my dear friend of more than 30 years, Steve Wexler.  The band plays a mix of R&B, Soul, Swing, and Latin music, and we had a great time.  It was exactly what I needed after my somewhat demoralizing afternoon of softball … a chance to do what I do best, with people I know and love.  (And for those of you near Peekskill NY, the venue, 12 Grapes, is a wonderful place with great food and an owner that not only loves music but also loves musicians … and it shows in every way.  Thanks Rich!!)

This morning I got the same, comfortable, ahhh-this-is-what-I-do-and-why-I-do-it smile on my face listening to Brendan’s recently posted mix of “Up, Up, and Away.”  And while I subsequently decided that the softball thing is probably something I’d rather do when they need a warm body than as a full-time team member, I also was reminded that you really do need to step outside your comfort zone from time to time … something I have *always* been terrible at (just ask my bandmates).  Of course, some things that used to be outside my comfort zone … like being a husband and dad … are now things I can’t imagine not being part of my life.

I guess it all gets back to finding your wheelhouse; where your proverbial sweetspot is in life.  It’s not coincidental that I learned this term as a baseball phrase (“that pitch was really in my wheelhouse!”) or that I’m writing this blog post as I plan to go out to L.A. and (finally!) finish writing our next GrooveLily concert-musical, “Wheelhouse.”  I really can’t wait.  After all, playing concerts with stories, singing lead, acting from behind the drums, were all things I once had no desire to do, and now can’t seem to quite live without.  Go figure.