My good friend Brian, a great guy and a well-established Montclair, NJ dad and citizen, heard me say that I would love to get involved in a regular softball game after so many years of my poor mitt sitting in a box wrapped around my now 25-year-old clincher. Turns out, he plays regularly in an over-30 league and managed to get me an invitation to join the team.  This past Saturday was the first practice, and I dusted off the old mitt and went over to the park with Suzanne, Elias, and Jacob in tow.

As luck would have it, there was another team from the same league practicing on the same field, so we got together an impromptu scrimmage.  I won’t go into the details of the game, other than to say my errors far out-numbered my contributions.  I imagine my expectations were way too high for a 47-year-old guy who hadn’t played in quite a few years, and I should have been happy with a base hit over the short stop’s head and a couple of good catches in the field, not to mention my 3-year-old saying “Good job daddy!” each time I came in off the field (he also would ask each time if the game was over yet, but that somehow lacks the poetic oomph I’m going for here), but I was sorta miserable. I couldn’t help feeling that I was letting everyone down, and I was embarrassed and mad at myself.

Rehearsing with "Steve Wexler and the Top Shelf" at 12 Grapes in Peekskill, NY

Luckily, that evening, I had a gig with “Steve Wexler and the Top Shelf,” a 9-piece band (4 rhythm section, 4 horns, and a great singer named Edlene Hart) led by my dear friend of more than 30 years, Steve Wexler.  The band plays a mix of R&B, Soul, Swing, and Latin music, and we had a great time.  It was exactly what I needed after my somewhat demoralizing afternoon of softball … a chance to do what I do best, with people I know and love.  (And for those of you near Peekskill NY, the venue, 12 Grapes, is a wonderful place with great food and an owner that not only loves music but also loves musicians … and it shows in every way.  Thanks Rich!!)

This morning I got the same, comfortable, ahhh-this-is-what-I-do-and-why-I-do-it smile on my face listening to Brendan’s recently posted mix of “Up, Up, and Away.”  And while I subsequently decided that the softball thing is probably something I’d rather do when they need a warm body than as a full-time team member, I also was reminded that you really do need to step outside your comfort zone from time to time … something I have *always* been terrible at (just ask my bandmates).  Of course, some things that used to be outside my comfort zone … like being a husband and dad … are now things I can’t imagine not being part of my life.

I guess it all gets back to finding your wheelhouse; where your proverbial sweetspot is in life.  It’s not coincidental that I learned this term as a baseball phrase (“that pitch was really in my wheelhouse!”) or that I’m writing this blog post as I plan to go out to L.A. and (finally!) finish writing our next GrooveLily concert-musical, “Wheelhouse.”  I really can’t wait.  After all, playing concerts with stories, singing lead, acting from behind the drums, were all things I once had no desire to do, and now can’t seem to quite live without.  Go figure.

“Because of slow ticket sales, they’re switching venues for our show.  The new place we’re playing is up here (indicating steps leading up to the building across the street).”

uh oh, I thought.  Brendan continued:

“They’re showing a double feature of Lethal Weapon 1 & 2 in the theater and we’re playing up there.”

As we ascended the stairs, I could tell that this was *not* good news.  My fears were realized as we entered what was obviously a medium-size student center.  The first thing I noticed was a *tiny* stage … barely big enough to hold a drum set let alone all three of us.  It was square with a rounded front corner, and completely surrounded by glass (a nightmare for any sound guy … or drummer).  This room was frighteningly reminiscent of several hundred college gigs we did ten years ago … frequently in rooms just like this, with our own sound system, with one or two students sitting there eating their fruit loops or pork rinds with no notice of a band playing.  These shows paid well, and kept us very busy, but also left us totally demoralized.

Brendan continued, doing his best to sound reassuring:

“I’m a little concerned that the drums aren’t here yet … the said they were using them in a battle of the bands somewhere else on campus and that they would be here any minute.  They’re also going to try and get something to cover the windows.”

“Wow” is all I’m able to mutter, trying not to have a hissy fit in front of Kirk, who is looking a little frightened about what my reaction will be. Of course, in my mind I was thinking that this is totally unacceptable.  Poor Eddie was wondering “where’s the PA?”  I looked at Val and she gave me what appeared to be the “can you believe it?  here we go again” look … she seemed to have already resigned to the situation, no doubt, I thought, due to the fact that she and Brendan got here earlier and have already had a chance to adjust.

Before I had much of a chance to formulate any more than my initial 3-letter reaction, Brendan said:

“The good news is that … I’M TOTALLY KIDDING!!”

Val and Brendan break into hysterics, amazed that they were able to keep a straight face for this long.  Eddie is next, clearly relieved and seeing how great the prank is.  Although it takes me one extra beat to realize their awesome gag … I cracked up and told them how much they *totally* nailed it.  They had me hook, line, and sinker.  I never considered that they might be joking.  It was a tremendous relief, and an *amazingly* executed prank.  While both Brendan and Val (and even Kirk, for that matter!) carried it off flawlessly, Brendan deserves the final bow, since he did most of the setup … Val later told me that she couldn’t look at me until that last moment, after we had come up the stairs and I first saw the room, for fear she would lose it.

Brendan then said “can I show you the beautiful theater we’re playing in now?” and we walked down the stairs, across the street, through the gigantic set shop and onto the stage of one of the nicest venues we’ve ever played.  Pepperdine is an unbelievably beautiful campus up on a hill overlooking the pacific … and the Smothers Theater is an equally gorgeous venue.  We had a great time playing there … made even sweeter by what I almost thought it was *going* to be.

It was a nice reminder of how far we’ve come; we just finished three consecutive weekends of gigs in Tulsa OK, Van Buren AR, St. Louis MO, L.A. and Castro Valley CA … all at lovely venues.

Well done V & B … you got me!

On the way to meet AJ, I’m fumbling with the car stereo to relax/distract me. “Sleeping Beauty Wakes” is one of the discs in the changer, and I’m reminded that this is my life too: making music with my other family, playing for our extended family. Man, I love this record. We sound good, like we’ve been making music together for almost 12 years. Just earlier today, while playing a brief moment of hookie from work, I was looking at our gig schedule and getting psyched about our gigs in the fall and realizing how much I’ve been missing doing shows with my band mates.

So, this is the life. And I mean that both euphemistically and literally.

But hell, what do I know, I’m a little drunk and sleepy.

Nahhh … I know. This *is* the life.

I sit here on a flight to Detroit for a gig with Audra McDonald.  As often happens on planes, I find myself rifling through my iPod, and I end up settling on the track we all played on for a tribute record to the wonderful Rachel Bissex.  Rachel had breast cancer and died in 2005.  She was a shining light on the folk music scene; as much for her spirit as for her music.  You couldn’t help but be touched by her, and if you knew her, you can’t help but miss her.  This recording features many of her closest friends performing her music, and all proceeds go towards the college education for her two children, Emma and Matt.  The song that GrooveLily played on, and that Brendan arranged and produced so masterfully, is called “Starting Over.”

For most of the gigs we did during our folk venue touring, I played a hybrid drum kit consisting of djembe (played with my hands), bass drum, hihat, and sometimes a snare drum (played always with “blasticks,” a sort of hybrid brush/stick made of plastic and specifically designed to have the impact of a stick — imagine me rolling my eyes as I display air quotes — and a volume closer to a brush).  While I sometimes enjoyed the challenge of generating the requisite intensity using these limited resources, I often longed for “my instrument” … drumset.  Don’t get me wrong, I love playing dynamically and being able to go from a whisper to a roar, and pride myself on being able to play very quietly without losing intensity when the situation calls for it (as it often does in my freelance work with singers and jazz groups in small venues).  But, I’m a drumset player first and foremost; the sounds and colors produced by wooden sticks on cymbals and drum are my natural palette, and I really missed it during those years.

Although many of those situations were uncomfortable for me as a result of this limited palette, they were also often very loving and full of community spirit … not to mention some truly incredible musicians, and just amazing people overall.  There were also some transcendent musical moments, both as GrooveLily and while backing up or sitting in with other artists at club or festival gigs that we would play.  One of these moments for me was the drum tracking for “Starting Over,” and to this day, I smile broadly when I listen to it, tears come to my eyes when I let myself get carried away by it, and I get shivers up my spine at the end.

There’s something about listening to this song while on a plane 30,000 feet up that really makes me feel closer to Rachel; while she and I were very friendly, I would not count myself lucky enough to call her a very close friend … but I swear I can close my eyes and smile up at her from this altitude, and she sees me and smiles back.  The way this track came together was a real testament to the best of the folk music scene; people making music together for both a greater good and for the sheer joy of it.  It also is a testament to how portable current recording techniques have become.  Brendan arranged it and recorded a fantastic demo, and all of us contributed the “real” parts separately: Val’s rocking violin and sweet lead vocal recorded at home along with Brendan’s and my vocal parts, my drum tracks recorded at my old fave studio BeatStreet, Tom Prasada-Rao’s near-perfect guitar part,  Rachel Garlin’s lovely lead vocal and Stephanie Corby’s heavenly (and I really do NOT use this adjective lightly … her vocal on this track really can’t be described accurately without reference to some sort of spiritual inspiration; it is THAT moving) lead vocal all recorded at Neale Eckstein’s FoxRun Studios in Sudburry, Mass.  Finally, Neale’s incredible mix, also done at FoxRun Studio.

In addition to sharing a passion for making and recording great music, we also all share a love for Rachel Bissex, and this recording is the result.    It’s so beautiful when talent, inspiration, and love can come together the way they did on this recording.  It’s really nice to sit here in the clouds and reflect on it … this is what folk music is really all about, bashing drums and all.

The theme that keeps appearing for me is “What do I do?” (I know … it’s always good to start with easily digestible small chunks … how am I doing so far?) I’d like to start with my recent trip to Pittsburgh.

Tracking background vocals for SBW

On Friday night 10/24, I flew to Pittsburgh for a Saturday vocal recording session with Brendan and Val for our upcoming “Sleeping Beauty Wakes” album. We’re really psyched about this record … it really feels like us; long time fans of the band should find lots to remind them of what has been special about GrooveLily all along, while at the same time it really feels like a new, inevitable step in our evolution (we throw around the term “GrooveLily 2.0″ from time to time … might be a little high falutin’, but you get the idea). The reason I think this session is so illustrative of how my (and Val and Brendan’s) life has evolved in the last few years is as much in the logistics of the weekend as it is in the content of the music we are making together. I left my full time IT manager day job (my title is “Manager, Technology & Development” … talk about high falutin’!) a little early to hop a flight from LaGuardia to go meet my band mates who are in Pittsburgh debuting a new musical that they were commissioned to write by the City Theatre of Pittsburgh. After a lovely evening with my sister Cherie, brother in law Stanley and niece Edie (who live in Pittsburgh), I met Val and Brendan at the theater at the makeshift studio they’d set up in a vacant dressing room. I think I speak for all of us when I say that there’s always a communal feeling of “oh yeah … THIS is what we do!” whenever we get together after a prolonged absence. This is not to say that the things we do when apart are in any way less important, less impressive, etc. It’s just nice to have an artistic and emotional home base to which you can return.

Ironing Board / Lyric Sheet Stand

As I write this, I realize the analogy I just made … “home base” … is actually the crux of my thematic wanderings as I pondered this blog entry. In baseball, there is only one home base. I realize that I now really have several home bases, that are all important in their own way, and that all require a similar amount of focus, care, and ambition. I imagine this evolution is similar for Val and Brendan … and happily, the overlap in the Venn diagram of our collective home bases is GrooveLily.

GrooveLily, Self Portrait, 10/25/2008.

My other home bases: My IT career, which was always part time until recently, and which is now something I am pursuing not just as an additional means of financial support, but as a part of my life that should be as fulfilling as my music career. Speaking of which, home base #2: my musical life in and outside of GrooveLily, for which my ambitions remain high. Finally, and by far most importantly; my REAL home base … my wife and son. Of course, each of these areas of my life crisscross, overlap, inform each other, conflict with each other, etc. But, I must cultivate all of them. This is at odds with a long-held common belief that you really have one vocation, and everything else is an avocation; sorta the real-life version of the baseball analogy. Well, I don’t believe that … I actually never did, but I feel even stronger now than ever.

There are so many examples of people like me, Val, and Brendan … those with multiple home bases, if I may. Some recent examples that I’ve noticed; Jim Webb … Senator from Virginia and author; I even remember hearing him say in an interview that he thought of himself as an author … that made me smile. I also recently heard a radio show that focused on Ted Conover and his book “New Jack,” which is about his life as an under cover prison guard at Sing Sing. Even though he is a journalist and author, he talks about how the lines became blurred, and how he couldn’t do the job half-assed; his life and those of his fellow guards depended on his really doing the job … not faking it. While not directly applicable to my situation, that aspect of it rang true with me: do it for real. There are so many other examples, including many friends of mine who are truly world-class professional artists (musicians, actors, writers, directors, film makers, dancers etc.) and at the same time have other careers … many of which are pursued with the same care, ambition, and joy that they pursue their art.

While I may always struggle with it, I am equally proud of and hopeful for each of my home bases. I also think that more and more of us are living less-than-typical slash careers like this … I expect that by the time my son is a rock star drummer / surgeon / movie star / middle school teacher / CFO of a major fortune 500 company, it will all seem normal.

Gene tracking

Ok … truth be told … there was only one blister, which is healing nicely, as are my knuckles and arms. But my weekend in the studio recording drum parts for our upcoming “Sleeping Beauty Wakes” record was a whirlwind for me. We are currently planning on 18 tracks on the record (note: things often change at this stage, so don’t quote me!), 17 of which have drums, so I had my work cut out for me. Happily, we rehearsed a lot, and made sure we were happy with our arrangement and drum part choices, so I was ready. We finished 13 tracks on Saturday, leaving only 4 for Sunday, which left us time to record drums on some other songs (details below).

Saturday: we arrive at 10:30 at Beatstreet Studios, the same place we recorded drums for the Midsummer record, as well as several other projects. Joe Franco, the owner, is a drummer’s drummer, with years of experience in the studio and on the road, and is also author of the well known “Double Bass Drumming” (which, for those of you who have ever heard my incredibly spazzy attempts to play double bass will surely know, I have never read … if you don’t know what double bass drumming is, check out this article). Joe and I have many mutual friends, and always love to kibbitz whenever we see each other.

Our excellent engineer, NickPhoto by Mark Diamond, www.diamondimages.com

Nick, the fabulous engineer, is a total pro, sweetest guy in the world, and a total ace when it comes to getting drum sounds; what takes hours in most studios at the beginning of the session takes Nick 30-45 minutes. We were up and running by 11:30 AM, and from inside the drum booth I have my now familiar view of Nick at the computer, Val and Brendan at the “producer’s desk” listening, taking notes, encouraging me after every take (some day I’ll have to take video of Brendan’s reaction after a particularly good take … you just can’t describe it in words!).

Val, Brendan, and Nick from the drum boothPhoto by Mark Diamond, www.diamondimages.com

The day goes very well, and I’m proud to say that I didn’t require tons of takes on anything. I was very happy with everything except possibly “Bring it On,” which I chose as the first track of the day. I played 2 or 3 takes, which were fine, but didn’t really bust out the way I wanted. We moved on, and I suppose I would have been happy with what we had … but … we ended up doing one more take at the end of the day strictly as a photo op; my cousin, Mark Diamond, is an amazing professional photographer and holographer, was in town and I was thrilled that he could visit the studio. He was willing to take some pictures, and we figured we might as well get some of me playing. So, trying to figure out what to play, we decided to do another take of “Bring it On,” mainly because it’s high-energy and would make for some (hopefully) good photos; I suppose there were some outside hopes of having moments we could cut and paste if needed, but mostly it was for the pictures. As a result, I was really just trying to have fun; not posing, but just relaxing and enjoying the moment because I figured that would look best. Well, as you may have guessed by now, it ended up being the take that we’ll use on the record … it was joyous, relaxed, and had the intensity my slightly tentative earlier takes lacked.

Mark

It’s funny to continually re-learn the same lesson in life … that things happen when you relax and stop trying to make them happen. I’m really happy with the pictures, and the track.

Finally, on Sunday we finished up the Sleeping Beauty tracks in equally quick fashion, and even had some time to add drum tracks to some of the “Hooked on the Bible” songs that Val and Brendan did years ago … those should be available shortly in the “Odds and Ends” section of the web site … pretty fun to make them feel more like GrooveLily songs.

Thanks to Joe and Nick at Beatstreet and big thanks and much love to my cousin Mark for letting us use some of the photos from that day on this page.