GrooveLily

BRENDAN (GRUMPY GUY):

Resolution—I am resolute
I will tie no tie,
I will suit no suit
I won’t be going out on the town
‘Cause my angst is up and my battery’s run down

What’s there to celebrate about?
I’d rather stay at home and grout
My shower stall than watch the ball
—I won’t go out...

No disappointments, no bad champagne
No red dress woman’s gonna yank my chain
No more surprises, I’m gonna stay right here
In my stocking feet with an ice-cold beer

Who needs to see my so-called friends?
They’ll only spend the night pretending
There’s a way on New Year’s Day to start again...

I ask you, what’s not to enjoy?
My cat, my couch, no hoi polloi
I don’t need my coat
Just my remote
And my La-Z-Boy